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Control your own kids

Is it just me or are there a lot of controlling moms, not so much dads, out there who take it upon themselves to “assist” in parenting your children?  One time, before Thomas was born, I took Charlotte to a library story time for toddlers.  After the reading, toys were brought out for all to SHARE.  Of course, like babies will do, the plastic blocks and big wooden puzzle pieces started going from hand to mouth to slobbered-on carpet and back.  You get the picture.  Another mom felt it was her duty to grab Charlotte’s arm, pull it down along with the toy in it from her mouth and tell her not to do that.  I didn’t say anything and just let it happen.  But I thought about how silly it was to police other people’s kids in a public setting where, let’s face it, germs are going to spread like wildfire no matter how much you try to monitor the situation.  Guess I’m just too laidback.  But I was not going to keep insisting Charlotte stop doing something she had been doing every day at home and in daycare just because a disapproving adult was watching.  I assume saliva and who knows what else can be found all over the play area at the mall and the indoor playground at a fast food restaurant, among other kid-friendly spaces everywhere.  In fact, recently Thomas was slapped multiple times in the face by a tiny but feisty 16-month-old girl in one of these germ-filled havens.  I watched, laughed, told her mom how tough she was and was actually relieved Thomas did not hit her back.  Some times we need to sit back and let our children figure it out for themselves.  Unless they’re in harm’s way, your kids are not mine to control.  And don’t say I obviously have enough trouble controlling my own… you and I already know that. :) 

Covenant RIPT, Week 9:  Last night’s class was just what I needed to remind me that I am in way better shape than when I started this program and I can just keep building on that from here!  I will miss Friday and Monday classes, so my plan is to work out Saturday and Tuesday instead.

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 20

This post was written by tthomas on March 11, 2010
6 Comments

2 against 1

Isn’t it amazing how much our kids’ moods dictate our own?  When they’re crabby, well l tend to be more easily irritated too.  That’s where I was yesterday afternoon when I picked them up early for another Charlotte doctor visit.  Thomas was upset the whole way there and Charlotte was similarly whining.  Daddy called just as I was trying to get them (and all of the stuff you have to bring with little ones!) out of the car.  Thomas was screaming and Charlotte was complaining across the parking lot.  Dave got the message to get there quickly.  Approaching the door to her doctor’s office, Charlotte sincerely asked me, ”How are you going to watch both of us?”  I honestly replied, “I don’t know!”  Can you believe it?  Even at 3 she knows when Mommy’s outnumbered, Mommy’s overwhelmed.  In the waiting area as Charlotte demanded fruit snacks and Thomas grabbed every door handle he could find, I sat there emotionally and physically spent.  “That’s why I’m glad I had you and your brother 10 years apart,” a woman told her son so I would overhear.  I don’t think she meant it to be mean, and I didn’t take it that way.  I told her I didn’t have time on my side.  She said she didn’t know how these moms do it with 3 and 4 kids.  I don’t know, either, I agreed.  As she saw, I can’t handle 2!  Then Daddy walked through the office door.  And just like that my stress was gone.  My hero had arrived.       

Covenant RIPT, Week 9:  Skipped the weigh-in last night for 2 reasons.  Didn’t want to confirm my weight has not changed and had to be in Cedar Falls for an event that didn’t leave me enough time or energy to go back to Waterloo.  By the way, Charlotte’s scalp is finally healing well!  So now maybe I can refocus on my fitness goals for a bit.

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 20

This post was written by tthomas on March 10, 2010
6 Comments

I’m an aunt!

Liam James

Liam James

Liam James, my sister’s baby boy, arrived three weeks early on February 9.  That following weekend we were supposed to have Sara’s baby shower, but her just over 7-pounder had other plans.  So this Saturday we will get together at my parents’ house in Peoria, IL, for her post-baby shower.

Sara, her husband Will & baby Liam

Sara, her husband Will and baby Liam

It’s exciting and, at the same time, a bit strange to see your little sis become a mom.  Now I know what she must have felt when I had my two.  You see your sibling in a totally different light.  She was always cut out to be a parent, though… loves babies, worked at a child care center in college, teaches 2nd grade.  And she’s fortunate Liam is the total opposite of her niece and nephew.  He sleeps a lot, barely cries and is content not being held round-the-clock.  Hard to believe we’re from the same gene pool! 

 

Charlotte and Liam

Charlotte and Liam

 

Liam and Thomas

Liam and Thomas

Covenant RIPT, Week 9:  I so don’t want to go to the weigh-in tonight.  After stupidly stepping on the scale yesterday morning, I have really set myself up for disappointment.  But Dave, ever the optimist, said he thinks I’ve lost more inches.  So we’ll see when the tape measure wraps around me in a few hours!

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 20

This post was written by tthomas on March 9, 2010
8 Comments

Parental Guidance

Amazingly Dave and I escaped to see another movie in the theater this past weekend.  Sadly I could not enjoy Brooklyn’s Finest as much as Avatar, not because of the movie itself but because young children came in midway through it!  I was so distracted by the thought kids not much older than my two were witnessing graphic violence and sex scenes, I could no longer get lost in the story line.  Others noticed it, too.  We overheard the people behind us talking about the children and the fact they should not be watching this movie.  It was a discussion that led one of them to leave and inform the staff, I later learned in our post-movie conversation.  The guy said he told one of the employees if they didn’t do something maybe he should contact social services.  From what I witnessed, nothing ever happened.  I watched the children (little boys who looked 4, 5 and maybe 6 or 7) walking out with their “chaperones” who were likely older brothers or relatives.  I don’t entirely blame the two young men who allowed those children to witness so much inappropriateness.  It’s their moms and dads who left them in charge that should not be off the hook.  Interestingly, we saw one of these older boys hold the door for an older woman on his way out.  So he knows what’s right.  Apparently, we were told from those who checked, the theater allows children 6 & older to watch ANY movie with an accompanying adult.  Give me a break.  You can’t get in to an R-rated movie when you’re in high school as easily as you can when you’re 6 with a ”responsible” adult.  It’s no wonder the ages of criminals police report to our newsroom get younger and younger.

Covenant RIPT, Week 9:  I had a good workout in class Friday night… then proceeded to go off my diet a little bit that night, Saturday night and last night.  I was so depressed when I stepped on the scale this morning and my weight had not changed since the last RIPT weigh-in.  In fact, it’s probably gone up since I had clothes on that time.  Not a good mental start to my week.

Charlotte from Readlyn

Charlotte from Readlyn

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 20

This post was written by tthomas on March 8, 2010
8 Comments

Daughter hurts, Mommy hurts

Charlotte’s latest scalp incision is not doing well.  Yesterday, we were at the doctor’s office to get her stitches out.  The spot from her mole removal re-do a week ago has crusted over, much like it did before.  And that prevents it from properly healing.  So began an afternoon ordeal of soaking the area with hydrogen-peroxide drenched gauze then holding her in my lap as a nurse and the surgeon cleared off the “cradle cap” and picked out the stitches.  Charlotte barely moved a muscle or made a sound!  I couldn’t believe it and neither could the nurse who said she was taking it better than some adults.  When the incision was cleaned up and the stitches were out, a bit of a gaping hole remains.  Now we have to keep up the 4-times daily hydrogen peroxide cleaning and add to it double antibiotic ointment as a constant cover to prevent infection and more scabbing.  Thankfully her preschool staff is helping us stay on top of all this monitoring.  I’m picking her up after the noon news to take her back for another check… which may result in another stitch or two.  It’s hard to stay focused when one of your children has a medical issue.  As so many of you know.

Covenant RIPT, Week 8:  Didn’t work out last night due to Charlotte’s doctor visit and healing issue.  Plan to make tonight’s class.  Wearing a pair of pants today I could not get over my hips in January!

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 20

This post was written by tthomas on March 5, 2010
7 Comments

Sore bottoms

I wrote about boobs yesterday, so thought I’d cover bottoms today.  Thomas continually gets a sore one, so we’ve graduated from diaper rash cream to Aquaphor to 1% hydrocortisone per a pediatrician’s suggestion.  It seems to be working, if applied regularly.  But the poor little boy has been touching his diaper at daycare and saying, “Ooowww.”  It’s frustrating because in less than 24 hours his bottom can go from seemingly fine to red and raw-looking.  He and Charlotte both have sensitive skin like me.  As for little girls, they are tough to keep clean down there.  It’s not easy teaching them to wipe from front to back.  Then you have to keep reminding them to flush the toilet and wash their hands.  One plus, I’m learning, for Thomas is being circumcised.  In the past year I’ve heard multiple stories about young boys getting infections under the skin fold.  Guess that’s one less thing I have to worry about!  Ha, ha   

*FREE* Family Event tonight:  3rd Annual Culture Fest from 5:30-7:30pm at the Waterloo Center for the Arts, crafts for kids and free food

Covenant RIPT, Week 8:  Last night’s class included a lot of jumping jacks and squats.  I can tell my leg muscles are stronger and leaner, which is great.  Some of the repetition is hard on my knees, but there are always lower-impact options that help.

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 20

This post was written by tthomas on March 4, 2010
23 Comments

Brutal honesty

Wanted to share with you what’s crossed my mind lately:

I understand why women get tummy tucks.  No amount of dieting or exercising will restore my stomach to its pre-stretched tautness.

Small breasts do sag after you nurse two children.  And I always said it would never happen to me, thought it impossible!

Is it possible to praise your child too much?  I want both of them to feel good about themselves but Charlotte has turned into quite the diva at times.

Facebook can be incredibly fake.  Like cliques in high school, groups are formed and fostered on such a shallow level I can barely stomach some of the status updates and responses.

Only recently did I get a cell phone with internet access, didn’t think I would really use it.  Now I do check Facebook and Twitter regularly, in addition to looking up info and phone numbers.  It’s fun and a timesaver.

Like me, my kids are sugar freaks.  They do a happy dance, literally, when candy hits their tongues.  I have convinced myself this is not an environmental outcome but a genetic predisposition.

I may be turning into the “fun mom” who lets her kids get away with too much and other moms roll their eyes over.  Fortunately Dave is fast becoming the “strict dad” who doesn’t let our two or many a neighbor kid under his supervision slide.

Soon Dave will need to schedule his first colonoscopy.  Of course we’ve talked about him getting another vasectomy, too.  Since his first one was reversed!  He is game for both procedures, amazingly.

Covenant RIPT, Week 8:  Did nothing last night in the fitness department.  Well, I folded and put away some laundry so I was a bit active.  Plan to do 15-minutes more of strength training tomorrow night to make up for it.  Another RIPT class tonight!

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 20

This post was written by tthomas on March 3, 2010
8 Comments

Are we talking about the same kids?

As I’ve grown older, I am getting better at taking a compliment.  In typical female fashion, I used to respond to them with self-deprecating humor instead of just a sincere thanks.  I reverted back to this reaction when a woman stunned me in the locker room before my fitness class last night.  Here’s the scene:  I take a cell phone call from Daddy about something as Charlotte wanders around talking to random women and Thomas closes open locker doors.  In the midst of this typical chaos, a woman looks me in the eye and says… no lie… “Your kids are so well-behaved.”  I could not hide my surprise at her assessment.  I told her I have never heard that before and honestly they are usually among the wildest in any kid crowd.  Adding that my politically correct way of describing them is “high spirited”.  She insisted many other children in that same setting have displayed much less control, some even climbing on top of lockers.  I didn’t mention the fact my two would have likely tried that if they were a bit taller.  Perhaps that’s the key to feeling better about your parenting:  Surround them with the most rambunctious children you can find and yours will look like angels!

Covenant RIPT, Week 8:  A lot of things, like sprinting, are getting easier.  Either because I’m in better shape or not working as hard, not sure which one.  Love the fact I can do an intense class and not feel sore later.

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 20

This post was written by tthomas on March 2, 2010
2 Comments

Our kids ARE our lives

You know you need a date night when you’ve forgotten the last time one happened.  That was us Saturday, so a call to the neighbors resulted in a 3-hour escape to the movies.  Everyone’s been telling us to see Avatar while it’s still in 3-D at the theater.  This was a rare chance to watch something before it comes out on video.  It won’t surprise many of you to find out, the kids came up in our conversation.  Dave said in the car how weird it was not to have them behind us in the carseats.  Then, this melted my heart, he turned to me in the middle of the movie and said, “I miss Thomas and Charlotte.”  Can you believe it?  A guy as crazy about our kids as me!  Thank God he’s their father and I can gush about how wonderful they are to him guilt-free.  We can’t help it.  Our kids are the center of our universe.  Why have them if not for that outcome?  And the good news for Dave, he is old enough that they won’t leave home until he’s in his 60s!  He’s more than okay with that.

Covenant RIPT, Week 8:  Friday’s class had lingering effects.  My back was sore Saturday from repeated crunching of each knee to my chest in a standing position.  I am way better at jumping rope than I imagined.  It’s been years since I tried!

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 20

This post was written by tthomas on March 1, 2010
5 Comments

She’s a fighter

So glad this latest medical ordeal is over.  Daddy and I dropped off Thomas at daycare this morning and took Charlotte to the surgery center.  Everything went surprisingly well, until I walked her back to the operating room.  All she knew was that the nice doctor was going to clean off her mole.  And she knew that wouldn’t hurt.  But I did not mention the gas mask because of how upset it made her when she had her initial mole removal.  In case you missed it, I screwed up on monitoring its healing and the spot needed to be cleaned up, re-cut and re-stitched.  So there I was in a hospital gown helping two nurses hold my daughter down as the anesthesiologist tried to cover her mouth and nose with the gas mask.  She fought us every breath until the one that relaxed her.  I didn’t get too upset.  I know it needs to be done and I was confident all would go well.  It did, thankfully.  Daddy and Mommy were by her side soon after.  Carrying her out to the car as Daddy pulled up, I could not get one thing out of my mind:  how incredibly difficult it must be for parents of children dealing with serious illness, longterm treatments and regular hospitalizations.  My prayer today is for all of us to be restored the privilege and opportunity of just tucking healthy children in bed at night and knowing they will wake up to see another day.

Covenant RIPT, Week 7:  30-minutes of strength training last night with Daddy.  Arms and legs still weak from Wednesday’s class… or I’m just too tired to bump up the machines to higher weights.

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 19

This post was written by tthomas on February 26, 2010
6 Comments