A regular blog reader suggested earlier this week I should seek counseling for my body image concerns. I emailed him back explaining that I don’t think it’s a serious problem, instead what runs through many a woman’s mind… I just post a lot of my thoughts about it on the internet for all to read. But hashing it over with Dave, imagine that, I have come to the conclusion that my job has contributed to the problem. For years I have regularly been told the following, “You look so much better in person!” Weekly, I hear this. Followed by, “You look so much thinner in person!” No doubt the harsh lighting and less-dimensional angle on TV have contributed to my not-as-attractive appearance on-air. To make me feel better people always tell me, you want to look better in person and we all know the camera adds 10 pounds. But I do think this type of persistent feedback has given me a bit of a complex. I will never look as good on TV. I will never look as thin on-camera. So let’s plan to run it to one another at some point in person. That way you can confirm what I’m writing here. But you don’t have to mention it to my face. I already know what you’ll be thinking!
Covenant RIPT, Week 2: 30-minutes of upper body strength training last night. Back to the RIPT class at 5:30pm. So far, so good with the diet but will not get on the scale until the Feb. 9 weigh-in. Can’t wait to see my results!
Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 18
This post was written by Tara on January 22, 2010
Our self-image is always the most critical or the most damaging. Some of us see ourselves as “okay” when in fact, we should lose dozens of pounds (I’m in this category). The mirror in my mind just sees the me I want it to see. Is this healthy? Absolutely not…I’m denying myself years of my life. On the other hand, the image someone else sees in the mirror might be one of “I’m too fat” when in fact, they aren’t and I don’t necessarily mean only those suffering from eating disorders like bulemia or anorexia. Even women within normal weight limits find fault in themselves. It’s society that dictates this and unfortunately, it’s society that reminds us when we don’t “fit in”. I may not be the healthiest when it comes to my body but I think my mind is fine and as far as what other people think….let THEM eat cake!!! Wait, that sounds good…..hahaha!!!
I love reading your blog but rarely respond. However, this one hit a nerve with me. I can’t believe someone would say something like that to your face! I think you look awesome on tv. But what I like best is how your beauty comes through in your personality – you are a “real” person, not some fake Hollywood star. You are a great HEALTHY role model for the young women (like my 14-year-old daughter) in our community – please stay “real” and don’t change anything.
Hi Tara,
I agree with fh’s email. You are a beautiful person inside and out! Please continue the good blogs and good comments.
I’m surprise a reader wrote you may have a body image concern or need counceling. I was very surprised to hear this! I feel just like you do and I’m NOT a t.v. reporter!! We, as women, are hard on ourselves and always strive to do better in life or with how we look. You are normal….and help the rest of us feel normal!!!
Have a great week-end!
Tara – I think you look fine. I also do think you obcess too much of your body image, on TV or off. Exercise is fine, but you feel you must do the hardest and the most extensive. Relax. What would you tell Charlotte if she were a teenager and have your extensive need to be perfect.
Enjoy your blog, but would rather hear about your family fun things. You never tell us what Thomas is doing.
Oh my goodness, Tara, I am laughing right now at the timing and irony of this as I just met you for the first time in person last night in Wal-Mart!
While I usually agree with John’s comments and I think he was just trying to be helpful, the counseling recommendation didn’t sit well with me either. I don’t think you are any different than the other 99% women who have diet/weight/body image issues. You just give it a voice via your blog. For that, I think us women are very thankful and feel more “normal” since we can relate to each other. Unfortunately we are subjected to all of the air-brushed, surgically enhanced super models we see daily on the internet, billboards, magazines, tv, etc.
As you already know of my weight loss journey, I have also put on some weight after recently losing it. Isn’t that the way it goes? It is a lifelong battle. We will not surrender! I was delighted to get to chat about these issues with you too. You getting right back on the bandwagon motivates me to do the same. Thank you!
After meeting you, I can’t say that I really compared your appearance to TV in the way you described until you verbalized it above. I think it is natural to have some sort of assessment on how someone on TV looks in real life. To me, it was just you being so much more real. Real in the personality aspect. I think that your public-eye career deems you to be professionally prim and proper. Sometimes to the detriment of stifling your personality. My observation of seeing you face-to-face is how AUTHENTIC you are and something about you just GLOWS!! Think of it as many other career women/men who have to wear different “hats” at work than they do at home or outside of work. The way you are presented on television is not necessarily the way you appear (looks or personality) outside of KWWL. Having not met you in person I would still think you look stunning on TV. You just look that much better in person. Yes, consider it a compliment. Think of it as “Better” and “Best.” Not “Bad” and “Good.”
Sorry for the book- it just hit home to me today. Keep up the awesome blogging, Tara. You are such a role model on and off TV!
Tarra,,,,,
Don’t let this MAN be your last straw before entering rehab!!!!
He is probably saying things to you that he can’t say to his wife!!
You are beautiful ! Tall, beautiful and YOU!
Stay that way.
The first time I saw you in person was at Target, okay maybe you need shop-a-holic couseling! tee hee, I was very impressed and felt a little intimidated as I am as tall as I am round! You be you!!
Counseling? No, you just need friends and your blog readers.
All women have body issues and it is totally NORMAL. I’m just glad that as a public person, you are able to share your personal side with us as well. Please continue on as you have been!
Good luck with RIPT!
I’m speechless.
First of all if you look over to the left, the Christmas pics you had taken show that you look great! Women worry about their weight (I’ve given up!) it’s just something they do, I think it begins in kidergarten actually because by the 3rd grade your being teased if your not skinny minnie.
I can’t imagine someone saying those things to you (or anyone else) but then not always do people know what to say…not that though!
We can’t all be like Barbie…but then not all men can be like Ken either!
Tara,
You certainly don’t need counseling,if so every woman in America needs it. I have met you and talked to in person you are truly a great person and very very real. You and your family are beautiful. Stay true to who you are as you ave a very REAL person..
I have seen you on TV, at community events and Sams Club (although I didnt introduce myself as I was wrestling two little ones into their fabulous carts) – honestly you always look great. What I see the most is your presence-and its beautiful. I think all women have some type of body issues and I am glad you are brave enough to put it out there for all of us who are thinking about ourselves the same way. It gives us all the chance to say – OK , whew – I am not the only one who struggles with this. You do a great job all the way around – stay true to you!
Tara,
I truely think you look beautiful both places. I have been given the chance to know you in person and above looks and all else your personality is amazing. You are such a great person and such a pleasure to talk too. You are a beautiful person.
Muah, Tessa(Jiva)
I should say here that I did personally apologize to Tara for the counseling comment.
And just in case of any confusion, I was NOT the person that made any comments about how she looks on or off TV! (I’ve never met her in person, but I agree she looks just fine on TV!)
Tara,
Many speak before thinking, rather than the other way around. What matters is how you feel about yourself, and the person you want to be. You’re a very beautiful person, inside and out. A caring, hardworking mother and wife who never seems to give up. Being twenty years old, I know all too well the pressures of having to “look good”. However, I’ve found that you’ll never be happy just making others happy. Live your life as you wish, and continue to share it with others and inspire them.
We can’t all be like Barbie…but then not all men can be like Ken either!
I think this was part of this guys point. But I think it is also the way guys are sometimes – let me explain.
From my point of view, I have lived my life surrounded by women. I don’t mean I am a womanizer, I mean I am outnumbered in my family by females. I often from women how fat they look and how much they need to lose weight. Much of the time, if a woman is saying this out loud, she actually looks just fine. Sometimes a little weight loss might be good for health, but a lot of times it is bad body image. Counseling?? I don’t think so, but working on accepting yourself as you are – not a bad idea. That doesn’t mean you can or should stop wanting to be healthier; just that you would do well do learn to accept the beauty you already have, while working toward a healthier weight.
I have some of these issues too as a man. I had lost 60 pounds over a period of 5 years and had maintained that loss. This past year had some different stress than I was used to dealing with and I went back to old stress eating habits. I need to break those again. Yes I would like to be thinner for looks and health – but I have spent too much of my life hating myself for weight or other issues. So, even if I don’t lose this 20 pounds or my overall goal of another 20 after that, I am still a worthy human being and you are too because….
Not all women can be like Barbie nor can all men can be like Ken! But maybe we can all be comfortable with who we are and stop hating ourselves for our body image; while working toward better health.
I love your new hair style. It focuses our view on your eyes more and makes you look much younger. The straight hair was just too severe.