It occurred to me recently that I’ve never been without Dave or the kids a single night since we got married. When Charlotte and Thomas are with my parents, Dave is with me. And when Dave is in Washington state, I’m always with our two. Honestly, I have never once thought about it being any other way. No desire for a girls-only weekend or escape. My refuge is with my family. My weekend is reserved for them and any activity that can’t include Dave and the kids is one I’ll dread if it tears me away too long. Perhaps it’s the many years of “me” time I experienced in my 20s. I had a thousand free afternoons and nights where I controlled the remote. Only my voice interacting with someone on the other end of the phone line to break the silence. I don’t miss those moments because the joy I derive from the contrast–married life with kids–is so great, I would never trade it back.
Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 43
This post was written by tthomas on January 27, 2012
I have an older daughter who is in her own home w/children and my husband is required to occasionally travel so I much look forward to the alone time and I can get so much done since I don’t have to stop for meals, run errands, etc. it’s a nice break from the norm.
I totally get that. Several friends have suggested that I should just go shopping by myself or have more me time. They are usually people whose children are older, or people with an only child. Someday I will have to hang out by myself from time to time or force my husband to do everything with me. For now, I will enjoy the time I get with my kids because it won’t last forever.
I used to hear, I can’t wait for ……..to go to school, I can’t wait for ……..to graduate from high school. I was NEVER anxious for my children to grow up and go to school (one was almost six (October birthday) when she went to school and our son was six and a few months before he started school since he had a May birthday and we decided that since I was a stay at home mom it was in his best interest to wait to start school) or college, enjoyed every second of every minute that I got to spend with them. Now we see them a few times a year as they have moved on with their lives after college (which is exactly what we raise them up to do), miss the good old days…….cherish every minute with them, it goes past way too quickly.
I love to hear you’re “all in”. It’s a good feeling, isn’t it?
I’m glad you think this too. I feel sometimes I am the only woman I know that doesn’t want to go out with friends and escape her husband and children for a few hours. My spare time is always with my family and I wouldn’t have it any other way
I am going to a conference in Green Bay next week and am there for only 2 days and though it will be a nice education experience for me, I dread being away from my husband and kids. I’m sure they will be the only things on my mind through the 8 hour sessions I am about to encounter!
I don’t like being without my husband or kids either. I, like you, am with either my husband, kids, or all of us together. My friends and family try to get me to take a weekend away or do a girls weekend. I don’t feel the need for it! I love being with my kids and husband and wouldn’t trade it for the world!
My daughters are 16 and 21 and we have rarely gone anywhere without them. In fact, when we take our yearly winter vacation they go with us. People always make comments like “you’re taking the kids along?” like they are in total disbelief! I would not have it any other way and I’m glad they still want to spend time with us. Too soon they will be gone and have their own families and so for now we enjoy it. It can be a challenge getting our schedules to coordinate (jobs, high school and college)but well worth it.
Thanks for this blog Tara! I totally agree with you! I haven’t been away a night from my kids since they were born and really don’t have a desire to at this point. There will be time when they are older for nights away…but for now, I want to be here for them. Good to hear others agree!