All the Hallmark cards make it sound like the holidays, when shared with extended family, are wonderful.  And mine usually are…but I have to admit it, since my children came along, the family get-togethers are stressful for Dave and me.  Here’s why.  Day after day, week after week, we rush around juggling our crazy schedules and high-spirited kids.  Always sleep-deprived, we rarely get a break when we can be alone… and when we do, it’s a 10-dollar-an-hour babysitter fee that doubles the expense of going out.  So when we pack up and head out to visit the grandparents, we look forward to some extra hands and free help.  But our “vacation” quickly turns into a nightmare when the kids’ schedules are thrown and we’re resented for not pulling our weight with the grandkids.  I am still upset about it today.  We want to spend time with our loved ones, but we also depend on them for a little relief.  The holidays are far from relaxing when you’re battling crabby kids and grandparents who think you’re a slacker.  They don’t see me carrying out my regular routine, so during a break when I’m not working and therefore trying to unwind I’m being judged unfairly.  Does this happen to anyone else when their extended family lives out of town?  Tell me I’m not alone.

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 16

So many people balk at the thought of getting up early to fight the crowds on Black Friday, you’d think fewer shoppers would show up.  Quite the contrary.  This was the busiest year I’ve seen.  And I go every year possible!  Dave gladly joins me, but his string of poor health continues as he was up half the night after Thanksgiving with stomach flu.  We’re at my parents’ house in Peoria, so Aunt Bird hit the stores with me at 4:45am.  My dad dropped us off and picked us up at every one!  Walmart was complete chaos.  The doors opened BEFORE 5 but you had to wait to put items in your cart until employees said the word.  Bad plan.  Fortunately, I’m not claustrophobic and can easily see over the crowd.  My sister is pregnant and was pushed at one point.  We did brilliantly ask Customer Service to ring us up and thereby avoid an hours-long wait in line.  Sorry, honey.  The $198 computer you wanted was gone in seconds and who knew it would be stacked in the grocery section to divert traffic from electronics?  I did snag 5 Miley Cyrus rocker t-shirts to work out in.  At 3 bucks a pop, I’ll wear her fashions.  Don’t worry, Hannah Montana is not pictured.  Off to Target and Kohl’s where we were in and out in minutes after assessing the lines.  Next stop, Burlington Coat Factory followed by Bath & Body Works and Sam’s Club.  Free breakfast there!  I picked up a couple things.  Then came Bergner’s.  What?  Boots are all 60% off?  Check out these new ones I’ll be sporting in the coming weeks:

The prices were so good, I got another pair of gray ones that are a different style.  Gordman’s was our last stop and we maed it home by 8:30.  So much fun… so much shopping and eating and doing nothing much with loved ones.  Last night Nana and Papa watched the kids so we could meet up with my high school friends at a local bar.  Dave was well enough to come.  Typical us, we left at 9 to go to Toys R Us.  The store, even that late, looked like a pack of toddlers had run through it.  A couple more toys in the back of the SUV and we’re nearly done with Christmas shopping for our two.  More eating and shopping on the horizon today.  I love Thanksgiving.

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 16

Eventually I will post pictures from our Christmas photo shoot this past weekend.  You will see a fairly calm and controlled family with smiles on their faces.  What the image does not capture is the behind-the-scenes drama that resulted in two bribes and an impulse purchase.  Here’s the back story.  I scheduled the appointment for 9 on a Sunday morning.  The thinking behind it, the kids get up so early they’ll be in a better mood at this time and we’re already dressing up for church at 10:30.  Yet we found ourselves driving around at 7, still in pajamas, trying to get Thomas to sleep since he was up at 5 and yawning before his bath.  It didn’t work.  Naturally, he fell asleep on the way to the photo shoot and was expected to be crabby and uncooperative.  Wrong.  His sister fulfilled that role.  Charlotte told me before we left that she would not change into the dress with the bow and presents on it I had laid out for her.  They wore Christmas pajamas for the first set of pictures, so I promised her a Blow Pop on the way to church if she would cooperate for the outfit change later.  It gets worse.  Once there, she refused to wear the striped Santa hat that matched her pj’s, even running away to the nearest couch and burying her head in defiance.  This is where I really went into desperate mode.  Thomas was waiting for her under a Christmas tree with a photographer shaking a stuffed kitty at him.  Our window was closing to make this happen.  If you do this, I told her, we’ll go to Toys R Us and you can pick out a toy.  MIssion accomplished.  I was thrilled with how well they turned out, considering.  But in a rush to get out of there and on to church, I agreed to a much-larger-than-necessary package.  I now have so many wallets of the same picture I ordered on our cards, I seriously considered handing them out at work like high school senior photos!  Dave, ever the supportive spouse, said we’ll take more time to order in the future and he’ll take the kids to the car so I can concentrate.  Sounds like a plan.  He even donned a white glove and red sleeve to play Santa’s hand in one photo.  This is the first year my cards and letter have been ready before Thanksgiving.  Let’s just hope the postage covers them with so many extra photos stuffed in for all our family and friends!  Oh, how could I forget, Charlotte picked out a Spongebob candy dispenser that cost $2.63 with tax.

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 16

As a parent, you truly have to embrace the concept that each day is a fresh start.  If you don’t, it’s scary to think how burdened you’d be not letting go of some of the stress and strife.  Take yesterday morning, for example, when I called to get my car in for a headlight out.  If I came right away, I could get my oil changed as well.  Perfect, I thought, since we’re going out of town later this week and both need to be done.  So you do what you have to do to make it happen, disregarding the fact it’s 7 in the morning and the kids are in the tub and you’re wearing pajamas.  Somehow I got us there and plowed through their running in the showroom, throwing Fruit Loops, peeing and pooping out of the diaper and all over clothes and spilling a cup of water THREE times on the floor and leather chair.  The entire dealership was reminded why Daddy usually brings our two.  He has better control.  A morning like that is directly linked to a night with a bowl of Lucky Charms or a trip to the station’s vending machine.  Sugar will surely make it better.  The optimist in me knows that tomorrow will start anew and I can move on from the Monday messes.  Then there’s the side of me who sees the glass half empty and knows that in addition to the energy I’ll need to get through tomorrow I’m faced with a nearly 16-month-old still on the bottle and a 3-year-old who, after months of dry days, had two recent pee accidents during nap time at school.  At least she hasn’t peed when she’s practically on top of me in our bed every night.  That’s a plus!

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 16

Sure the things our children like to do are cute.  But they’re not funny when repeated a thousand times!  Thomas, with my guidance, now knows how to flip the light switches.  Unfortunately, he is way too short to reach any around the house.  So guess who has to hold him up when he grunts and points at them non-stop?  The idiot who introduced the contraption to him–me.  He also enjoys throwing things.  Balls are fine when he can retrieve them and re-throw them on his own.  But flinging raisins and Lucky Charms off his high chair means Mommy has a sore back and shoulders.  Bending down to retrieve them while maneuvering under the table and around the chair legs is like a bad game of Twister.  I’m too old for this and my body never contorted much to begin with.  I swear the kid can walk in a room and knock down or tear apart anything that isn’t nailed or glued in place.  In 30 seconds he can pull Charlotte’s giant teddy bear and pillows off her rocker, scatter the floor with her books from a bin and mess up her neatly-made bed.  She gets mad and I prepare for another clean up in aisle 1.  Having two children 3 & under is like an on-going clown skit.  I never cared for clowns, and when they came out during the circus they’re constant running in circles and in and out of tiny cars actually bored me.  Now I’m doing it.

Ki'Mari from Waterloo

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 16

My girl, Eileen Loan, rocked the Dillard’s fashions she wore on the runway today.  I emceed a style show for the Sartori Festival of Trees and our morning meteorologist modeled her heart out:

Work it, Eileen!

I was decked out in a stunning, red garnet Dillard’s dress with intense bling.  And of course I forgot to have someone take my picture!  I did, however, snap a few pics of the male models and event co-chair:

Dave Reidy, Jack Dusenbery, Chris Hyers, Paul Franke

Gary Kroeger

Megan Fereday

To bed at midnight and up at 5:30 this morning, I am dead right about now as I skipped a morning cat nap to jump in the shower and throw on some make-up as Thomas slept.  Upon dropping him off at daycare, I rushed to the style show.  Tomorrow I’m taking Charlotte to the festival’s Teddy Bear Tea.  I can’t wait for that.  Mommy/daughter time AND a chance for some sweet treats.  Thankfully, a woman interviewed for a taped weekend segment left behind some red velvet cupcakes with cream cheese frosting and frosted sugar cookies in the newsroom.  All hail the mid-day sugar boost!

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 16

You cannot open a newspaper, check your email in-box or turn on the TV without hearing about a child dying from cancer, a battered woman living with her three kids in a shelter, a father who committed suicide because he could no longer support his family, you name it.  My church’s prayer list, alone, breaks my heart.  But add to it story after story of sickness and tragedy and deprivation… and I have to admit, one starts to feel quite guilty about things going well in her own life.  It’s to the point where I have to grab the remote and quickly turn the channel if a commercial with starving children or abused animals comes on because I cannot stomach anymore.  I know this is reality.  I know I can’t ignore it.  But I also know it’s overwhelming at times when there is so little you can control in your own life and yet, exposed to all of this, you’re an immensely selfish person because you’re often taking it all for granted.  In just the past 24 hours I have learned the husband of Charlotte’s favorite former preschool teacher has pancreatic cancer, one of my daughter’s classmates is hospitalized with breathing problems and I’ve gained nearly 10 pounds since the beginning of September.  Sorry about that last one.  It’s true, but was added in jest to lighten the mood of this entry!

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 16

Cal Ripken and Dave, All Star Weekend 2007

Not sure if I’ve mentioned before that, when we met, Dave had never seen me anchor the local news because he was watching ESPN.  I always thought that was a good thing since some of my on-air co-workers have been involved with people who wouldn’t want to date them if they weren’t on TV.  Sad, I know.  What I didn’t realize then is how much Dave watching sports around-the-clock would be a future indicator of life in our home.  It’s like white noise to me.  I grew up with a father who watched pretty much every sporting event on multiple TV sets literally stacked on top of one another.  This was long before the days of split-screens or the “go back” button on the remote.  You name the family occasion and, it’s a safe assumption, at some point a TV was turned on in the background.  We had one in the kitchen, every bedroom, den, something like 5 in the basement and one in the backyard for summer viewing.  No kidding.  When my dad was around, he always turned to sports.  Instead of taking an interest in the teams or the rules, I learned to live with it and mostly ignore it.  Yet I ended up choosing a mate who mirrors my father when it comes to sports viewing.  And with the proliferation of channels devoted exclusively to athletics, watching sports on TV has never been more accessible.  Thankfully, a book or a laptop is within reach for me to still spend time with Dave and not be totally subjected to watching something I’m really not that into.  Charlotte, on the other hand, wants to watch football or basketball with Daddy or Papa.  She loves it!  And since, like my father, Dave doesn’t hunt or fish or camp it’s nice to have him around every weekend-even if I have to repeat a question 5 times before he answers because he’s in the zone.  You know what I mean, ladies.

One of my dad's many TV set-ups

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 16

Recently while watching Oprah on the DVR, I told Charlotte to check out the singers in the karaoke challenge.  I thought she would enjoy them.  Cut to the panel of judges, “That’s Hannah Montana’s dad,” she proclaimed, when Billy Ray Cyrus appeared.  News to me.  I had no idea she watched the show, let alone retained specific characters.  Good reminder that, if you let your children out of the house, you cannot shield them from much of anything.  They will seek out the information and commit it to memory!  I did, after hearing some eye-opening things on the bus in 4th grade.  I was the oldest of two daughters in my family, but all the kids with older siblings always know a lot more than they should.  And they share it with the innocents around them, who in turn are no longer so naive.  It’s inevitable.  Don’t have cable?  Your kids will hang out with someone who does, or in today’s world watch it for free on the library’s internet.  Ban sweets in the home?  Your kids will beg and plead and mooch their way into sugar fixes at every turn when they’re over at a friend’s house or next to someone in the lunch room.  Why am I so sure?  Because I grew up with cable and a ton of candy around… and all my friends who were deprived of both flocked to my house whenever possible.  Of course I work in TV now and I’m addicted to sugar.  Go figure!

Landon from Festina

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 16

Wanted to share with you thoughts from a local dad and blog reader, Jeremy:

I work 2^nd shift at John Deere and my wife works 7-4 at Home Depot.  We also have two children (Abryanna who is four, and Kaysen who is almost one).  It has been a difficult transition to this style of a relationship for us.  We are lucky that my wife’s mother lives here in Aplington as well.  She comes in very handy helping my wife.  I really look forward to the time that we can spend together on the weekends, plus the added benefit of having another person around to help with the kids.  The one bright side is the amount that we are saving on daycare, although I am not sure that it is completely worth it.  I have found that we use a dry erase board to leave each other messages.  It may be to get the clothes out of the dryer, or it may be to remind us of an upcoming appointment.  At any rate, I was deployed overseas and I always looked forward to getting videos from home, now I actually kinda find myself looking forward to my wife writing something special on the board for me.  So I guess what I am saying is that I understand what it must be like to work different shifts.  But I look at it as a blessing because I can do things with my daughters (like try to feed Kaysen potatoes) that my wife would never let me do.  I was gone for a lot of Abryanna’s infancy, but I think that I am making up for it now with her and Kaysen.  I am really starting to see more of me in both of them!!  I enjoy the time that I have with my daughters alone, but I still miss having my wife there with me.

Jeremy's children, Kaysen & Abry

Posted under Baby Thomas: Month 16