I just got done watching a documentary called “Somewhere Between”

It talks about children adopted from China and four of the stories are shared in the film.

In the end–one of the girls travels to China and actually meets her real biological parents. She says ….” I feel as though I don’t belong in America and I don’t belong in China. Essentially I am trapped somewhere between”.

Though I was not adopted and grew up in a huge community of Pakistani’s –sometimes I can understand the sentiment.

I am so lucky that I grew up with this extended family of “aunties and uncles” in Minnetonka. Not a weekend went by that I was not at a baby shower, birthday, graduation etc.

These boys and girls I grew up with–mostly all first generation Americans and I bonded greatly. They could understand the challenges of culture clash that would happen.

At these gatherings I never felt out of place or awkward in the slightest but when I went to my predominantly white school–I felt like I stuck out like a sore thumb.

When I went to college I was so pleased to find a huge group of Pakistani’s to again be around. I had friends from all different cultures and loved it!  I quickly joined the Pakistani Student Association–the same one my parents started when they attended the University of Minnesota.

All my life I have tried to make friends and surround myself with people from all different cultures and backgrounds. I consider myself a very complex mix of East and West.

When I go visit Pakistan–I may look like everyone else but as soon as I open my mouth and speak Urdu people can tell my accent is American. They can also tell from the clothes I wear and my awe and curious nature about everything around me.

When I am here–I do fit in but I am not like most people around me. It doesn’t really bother me but it can be interesting if you have never experienced it.

I love aspects of both cultures and am blessed by my Pakistani background. I wouldn’t trade that for anything in the world..even if at times I do feel “somewhere between”

Great Documentary!

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Mr. New knows how to make my day. I had been telling him that I was in the need for some “surprises” lately. I said it mostly jokingly and laughed that last time we went shopping he got fun stuff for grilling (including a new grill) and that I wanted a treat for me.

When I got to my car today after the newscast-I found a surprise waiting in my car. He had snuck over the station and put a lovely bamboo plant with a sweet card on my passenger side.

He always knows how to make me smile. I only hope I do the same for him.

Always knows how to make me smile!

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I have a big dream.

Okay-for some people it may seem small but for me it’s a culmination of a lot of effort.

Last year I headed out for a fun day at Artapalooza in Cedar Falls. If you have never been you would love it! It’s arts, it’s crafts, it’s photography and it’s shopping for unique items at it’s finest.

As I was walking along enjoying the sunshine and looking at the gorgeous photos up for sale it hit me like a ton of bricks.

Hey…you could do this! You could get a camera and start taking pictures and be here next year….

The idea didn’t leave me that day. It started to build and build until I finally went out and got that camera! I started taking a few pictures here and there! Soon I wanted to take pictures everyday!

I started thinking that maybe I really could be at the Artapalooza event next year.

And then there it was–in my inbox last week.

The call to artists for Artapalooza. I had to enter!

Without hesitation I grabbed  a pen and filled out the application. I called Mr. New and gushed over the phone about how much I wanted to be part of it.

Only problem is that it’s a selected process.

I poured my dreams on my application and a separate sheet of paper and got the stuff in today. I filled out the check with my hands shaking.

We will let you know if you get in by June 13th!  They said.

I have done all I can and now I wait.

To be there with my artwork in the sunshine this year would be a dream come true.

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When you are a woman in your 30′s who is unmarried with no kids-sometimes people treat you like a Leper.

Before I met Mr. New when I was (gasp) single, unmarried and with no kids –it was even worse!

“So you aren’t dating anyone? Any one at all?”

“So you are in this new city by yourself?”  This was usually followed by a concerned look and sometimes by a look of admiration which I always appreciated.

Yes I took the unconventional path and I wouldn’t trade it.

I find in Iowa the subject comes up more than ever before.  Everyone seems to be wedded and babied (does that even make sense?)

I was actually once told that I needed to observe women with children so I can get an idea what they deal with.

What I really want to say is the following:

I have lived an amazing journey so far and when marriage and kids come into the picture-it will be another wonderful facet to my life! I love having my freedom and love that I moved to so many cities pursuing my DREAM!

Everyone follows a different path. Mine never really wanted diapers and burp rags for a long time!

In fact–I sometimes really, really wonder how all you wonderful moms and dads actually DO IT! I hear Jason’s schedule with soccer and shuffling kids to school and it exhausts me even thinking about it. (though I am sure for any parents it’s fulfilling in it’s own way)

I can fully face that I can barely take care of myself! It’s enough to get me fed and to all my appointments! Plus I really like being lazy in front of the couch with lots of treats..:)

What I do know is how excited I am for the future! I finally have the man I always wanted and that gives me lots to hope and dream  about!!!!!

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Ignorance is scary. Stereotypes are scary too.

They can permeate minds, create huge tensions or simply offend and hurt.

They create a host of problems.

Today I witnessed a situation that was both jaw dropping yet also sad in a way as well. To realize how small some minds are can be shocking.

It was after a story had run about a bomb blast in Syria. A small town completely wiped out. Women, children and innocent lives lost. It doesn’t matter what your political views-it’s still sad.

The villages mourners were burying the bodies and weeping-loudly as is the custom in many other regions of the world.

The comment I heard was the following

It started with a snicker.

“Wow…I find that ironic”

I look up in shock.

“It’s amazing how those people have no regard for life” (more laughter)

“It’s like those people who have the least regard for life wail the loudest” (more laughter)

“And look how they are treating those bodies! Like shuffling around like they just don’t even care. SHEESH!” (followed by a head shake and snicker loudly)

“In the United States at least we treat our dead with respect”

I felt my heart start to race and it took every bit of effort not to say something. 

You see this person had no idea what they were talking about. And even if they did– the complete insensitivity to the subject was appalling.

In that culture-burials are different. Syria is predominantly Muslim and Muslims are buried in a clean white sheet in the ground without a casket. That is what the video was showing without actually showing any bodies. And the wailing? The show of grief that was somehow interpreted as distasteful? And to comment that the wailing was in some way in poor taste because “those people have no regard for life”

It’s amazing to me the lack of understanding in the world or the lack of sensitivity.

I would hate for the mother or father of one of those innocent children killed to hear the comments like that. People die all over the world all the time-innocent people.  It doesn’t matter the color, race, ethnicity or creed-human life is precious.

Ignorance and hate is scary.

Education is key…and maybe some common decency to boot.

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I have been experimenting with trying to limit wheat in my diet. I went to the store and bought some Coconut flour to try this wheat-free bread recipe. I will try tomorrow and give you an update when I do!

Recipe!

COCONUT FLOUR BREAD

WHEAT-FREE

6 eggs

2 tbsp raw honey

1/2 cup grassfed ghee, coconut oil or butter*, melted

1/2 tsp celtic sea salt

3/4 cup organic coconut flour, sifted

1 tsp aluminum-free baking powder

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. In a medium-sized bowl mix eggs, ghee*, honey and sea salt until well-blended. Combine sifted coconut flour and baking powder, and whisk them slowly into the batter until no lumps remain. Pour the batter into a small greased loaf pan (9x5x3 or smaller). Bake for about 40 minutes. Remove from pan and cool on rack.

This unsweetened bread can be sliced and enjoyed much like many other bread. Because it lacks gluten and doesn’t contain yeast, it has a different texture and taste than wheat breads. This recipe can be doubled for a larger loaf, or divided into 2 smaller loaf pans for a nice tea bread.

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Being on television you often worry more than others might about strangers and people lurking in bushes and dark alleys.

I am always very careful and mom made sure when I moved here that I rented a place that had an attached garage. She wouldn’t hear of her baby walking to her car in the dead of night to go to work.

Even now it’s a requirement when I leave Minnesota to lock the doors, wear my seat belt and say a prayer before I turn the ignition.

Today I had a bit of a heart stopping moment at home.

My doorbell rang and I saw a tall, younger (20′s) man standing on my doorstep. This was odd to me since I rarely have strangers at my door. Usually it’s my friendly neighbors or a package delivery if anything.

Against my better judgement I opened the door and saw the man standing in my glass door outside between the main door and my only exit. My first thought was that he could easily push me inside my house and I would have nowhere to run.

“Hi-I was scoping the neighborhood for a place to live and I heard this was for rent and mind if I take a look inside”

INSIDE? 

I was shocked and my heart started to thud. I mustered my courage and said “No I DO NOT feel comfortable with you doing that”

He continued “I am going to UNI and my mom is in the car. We are looking for a place. Do you like living here?”

I got extremely worried at this point because I figured he was trying to get a sense of my whereabouts and surroundings and the feeling in my gut was not good.

“How much do you pay here” he asked.

“If you have any questions you can call my landlord” and with that I said a quick bye and shut the door as fast as I could.

I ran to my window and looked outside to see his SUV pull out of the driveway. Far too fast for me to even look at the license plate.

I was panicked at this point especially since I had only told my landlord that I wasn’t sure if I would resign my lease but had never once indicated I was for sure moving out!

I called Mr. New who himself was beyond worried. He asked if I got a plate number and then said he would beef up security and do a drive by the neighborhood later because he didn’t like the sound of that.

I instantly called my landlord after and found out he had met with the guy and told him my place MIGHT be up for rent soon but he wasn’t sure and that he could drive around and look at it but he was shocked the guy had actually come to my front door! I couldn’t believe he thought a woman alone would let a perfect stranger into her house to LOOK AROUND at her place!

My landlord was very sorry and told me he would never send a stranger to my front door.

After it all I felt a bit silly and realized I had been pretty rude to the guy at the door but these days you never know and I would much rather be safe than sorry.

I think I learned my lesson. Next time I don’t have a clue who the person is–I just wont’ open the door at all.

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Working with a great friend can make your job extremely interesting at times. Jason and I are good friends. We laugh at the same things, share inside jokes and go to the gym together everyday between newscasts. We just “get each other” and it wonderful to work with someone like that. I spend more time with him than Mr.New or ANYONE for that matter. We are together from the moment I walk in the door and then for 10 hours after that. Yes we fight at times and argue but that’s what you do with any good friend.

The laughing however can pose problems. Take today for example. We were just plain goofy all day. During the noon show-Jason read a story where he just could not for the life of him get a single word correct. I started giggling and had to look away and then when my read came on I couldn’t contain myself and Jason had to take over reading.

I could hear his voice shaking as he read and I completely lost it at that point. He had to read the next story too and the teases to commercial break because I couldn’t handle anymore after that.

Giggling is like sneezing-sometimes you just can’t contain yourself!

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Good news! I got some Prednisone to tide me over until my doctors appointment next week. Hoping it helps calm down the itchy skin! Bad idea to research the medication on the internet though! Wow does it have a lot of side effects! Also have a complete physical scheduled next week too. Time to get to the bottom of this !  Feeling hopeful

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Couldn’t sleep so decided to write another update. The itching is worse this morning leading to me calling in sick again to work (something I hate doing)!

I had scheduled an appointment with the dermatologist for next week but am going to try and beg them to come in today. This morning I woke up and my lips are cracked and bleeding and I’m still itchy! What on earth is going on! The worst is when you cannot get to the bottom of something that is bothering you. I woke up about every half an hour last night because my lips were so dry I could barely move them without severe pain.

I really am hoping for some answers because this is miserable. Thanks for all your suggestions so far!

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