Having someone who supports you in your dreams is priceless. I am finding that out more daily. I will admit that I can get a little bit too driven at times.

I want to achieve so much and want so many things and on occasion I go so fast in life that I don’t stop and appreciate what is in front of me. I get it from my dad. Even today he sent me the following text message”

Is all well? Focused on short and long term goals and ambitions?

Do you have written down clearly defined plans?

Yep. I get it from him. Not that there is anything wrong with being driven to success but there is a time and a place for it and you also must look in front of you and appreciate it in the very moment.  Mr. New is showing me that different side. He shows me it’s okay to slow down and enjoy the process. It’s okay to take a deep breath and not be going at 100 miles an hour all the time. He tells me I need to be patient and enjoy the process. We both learn from each other. In many ways me being driven is showing him that he can reach goals he never dreamed possible while he shows me that in reaching goals one must also appreciate the small things. It’s a good yin and yang.

The things he cares about blow my mind sometimes. The way he vacuums the basement because he cares my parents are coming and wants it clean. It doesn’t matter much to me but it’s something he does just because he cares. Last night at the UNI game someone brought over a pepperoni pizza. Mr. New took off every single piece of pepperoni because I don’t eat pork and he has stopped as well.  He won’t eat pork at all anymore. He also stopped eating peanut butter since I am highly allergic.  These little things mean so much. It shows how much he cares and I feel so blessed to have a man like him. On Friday I received a gorgeous bouquet of flowers at work…..just because.

They say when you are with the right person it just feels easy. Well this is beyond easy. It just fits and it fits in a way that nothing else ever has before. Yes we will probably have bumps in the road and battles we fight but I feel ….secure with him. Secure in a way where no matter what gets in our way we will find a way to overcome those obstacles together. I am still learning to trust and that is hard. It’s very tough to give someone so much power to hurt you…but somehow deep down I feel it’s certainly worth the risk.

A note left for me!

I get a sweet note each morning when I wake up!

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I had to pinch myself a few times yesterday. Was I really at the UNI game wearing a UNI shirt and cheering really, really loudly for them? Yep–I sure was and it was actually a lot of fun! Some of you know that I am a huge Oregon Duck fan but I have no problem going out and supporting the home team here!  We went out early in the day and met up with some of Mr. New’s friends for a fun few hours of tailgating before the game. It was extra nice because the weather was amazing. Jason Carter even showed up with a buddy and it was just an overall good time hanging out and meeting new people.

A part of me was a bit apprehensive. I am so used to going to the huge, action packed Duck games and was not sure what to expect. Mr. New had warned me that I might be disappointed with the crowds that would show up for UNI but I was pleasantly surprised. It was a perfect mix of people and though I did have a few moments where I really missed Oregon–I enjoyed the game immensely.

I also had one of those “life is good” moments while there. I was having fun, the sun was shining and I had just seen my awesome neighbor Don Blau. I looked around and saw Mr. New and thought to myself ..”Life can’t get much better than this”. I have a wonderful, supportive man in my life who would do anything for me, a good job that I enjoy and friends who are caring and kind.  Life may have it’s ups and downs but I have a lot going for me and I need to appreciate and remember this more often.

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It seems like it’s been forever since I have seen my family and I miss them lots!  That’s why I am very excited that my mom and dad are coming to visit me next Thursday! I cannot wait to have them come to Cedar Falls. Last time they were here was months ago and we barely had any time to spend together since they came during the week when I had to work. This time I will get to spend a weekend with them and I already have lots of things planned including BBQ-ing on the deck and having my mom cook me tons of good food!

It might also be a good time to have them meet Mr. New. I am still on the fence about this. Culturally my parents are very liberal however it’s still not something regular in our culture to date and introduce your parents to a guy in your life. I do think my parents might surprise me though with how they react. They have loosened up a lot since we were little girls growing up and they are quite open minded and liberal. When we were little my dad was pretty strict. He wouldn’t let us pierce our ears, watch movies beyond our age range or go to the park ourselves. I see now that he was protective because he cared about us so very much. As we got older he gave us a lot more freedom and was always more of a “friend” than a dad. (Though with one single “dad look” he could put us in our place)

Before we went to sleep my sister and I had to recite four words each night.

PRIVACY, DIGNITY, HONOR, PRIDE

He never let us sleep without saying that. Now I see why. I try to live my life by these four words daily. They are ingrained in my head and in my very being all because of my dad.

I cannot wait to see them!!!!

Now I have to make sure to scrub the house from top to bottom so it looks extra nice for them when they get here. It’s going to make for a very nice week knowing they are on the cusp of coming!

Family is everything to me

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It’s been tough trying to find time to spend with Mr. New during the week. We both work demanding  jobs with long hours and both have commitments and activities that are required after work. Mr. New plays in several sport leagues which eat up his afternoon/evenings regularly and I have my RIPT class and more importantly the much needed activity called SLEEP.

Juggling all these things can make it tough to make time for each other but we always try our best. I appreciate how he adjusts his schedule weekly to make more time for us.

Today was one of those days when he got off work early and we had a few hours together. He really wanted to go see his Grandma who is in a nursing home and I agreed to accompany him. His Grandmother is 100 years young and still in amazing fit and form. There are times when she doesn’t remember him or gets confused and I know how hard that is on him. Today she perked right up when she saw us and started talking right away. This was only the second time I had met her. I went to her 100th birthday party and brought her a tiny plant which she had on her dresser when I walked in her room.

Mr. New would be slightly embarrassed for me to say this but he is a big softy! He has a very hard time seeing his once active Grandma struggle with daily tasks and be in the condition she is now. I know how hard it is for him to go visit her which is why I plan to go with him whenever he needs. I have seen him on several conditions get quiet and sad when he goes and sees her. I understand completely.

My own Grandma was called “Nani” and I loved her dearly. She lived with us in Minnesota for several years throughout my life.  She would come and go. Jetting over to visit her other sons in Canada and my Aunt in England. Still she always had a special place in her heart for our family home and always told us how she felt more relaxed with us than anywhere else. Despite those short trips she always came back to stay with my family.

She was married at the young age of only 13 to my Grandfather who was nearly 30. This may sound shocking but in that time and in the small village she lived in-it was not uncommon. They lived happily together until my grandfathers death many years before hers.  She was courageous beyond belief. Surviving a bout of stomach cancer and having most of it removed she still thrived and lived a long life. I couldn’t believe she would fly solo without knowing a lick of English and manage to be just fine and always assert what she needed. She would spend hours helping my mom in the kitchen and washing dishes. I think she felt she needed to “earn her keep” while she stayed with us when we would have kept her forever without her lifting a finger.

She could tell a dirty joke in Punjabi that would make the whole room laugh and was the life of the party. I see this now in my mom who has a huge knack for entertaining and being social. She always wanted the latest gossip. She would sit me down and make sure I told her “the dish” on friends and family. I gave her a million insulin shots on her fingertips and I always shuddered while she barely flinched. When she was away we would Skype and she would call at least once a week. Even though she didn’t understand English she had her favorite shows which included The Price is Right and Supermarket Sweep.

I miss her dearly.

A little over a year ago I received a call in Eugene that changed everything. She had been in poor health and had gone back to Pakistan to stay with another of my aunts for a bit. Even though she was so weak she still kept telling us how she would regain strength and come back to Minnesota and be with us. It never happened.

I am happy for all the times we had to spend with her. I have learned so much about courage and strength from her and she lived a long  and happy life.

I told Mr. New today that he should see his Grandma weekly no matter how hard it is for him. You never know which moment could be the last one. Cherish those around you!

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It was hard to wake up and go to work this morning especially after such a wonderful time in Galena. It was beyond my expectations and so lovely this time of year. I could not believe how many shops they had on Main Street and all the gorgeous scenery! I want to go again and it was so hard leaving!

The entire weekend was kicked off by a card that Mr. New gave me as soon as we sat in the car. It had a message on the front that made me cry. Inside he had written about how he has never been happier and how much I mean to him. Sometimes I have to stop and pinch myself. Is this guy really this sweet?

When we arrived at the lovely Le Fevre resort and went and checked in, I had no idea the surprise that awaited me inside. Mr. New had reserved the “romance package” and I had a lovely rose with chocolates and wine glasses waiting for me. How nice!  The room was adorable with a cozy fireplace and a huge hot tub for relaxing. I was ready to move right in!

This was waiting for me when we arrived!

Another wonderful thing was that Diane, one of the KWWL photographers had let me borrow her fancy camera to take with us! She knows about my love for photography and let me borrow her Canon T3i camera to play with on our vacation. I couldn’t wait! In fact I started reading the manual right when we got in the car and snapped the photo above with it! It’s amazing the images it takes and how clear and beautiful they are. Sure beats my tiny digital camera. Thank you Diane!

We headed right out to the shops on main and started walking around. I am so glad I brought my jacket with me. It was freezing most of the weekend! We didn’t let it ruin anything though although we were not able to enjoy the outdoor patio and BBQ at our resort like we would have liked.

That night we went back to the room and headed out again to enjoy a night on the town. We checked out the Galena Brewing company and many of the other cute bars and restaurants in the area. It was so nice to be away for awhile and just enjoy each other. That night we lit a fire in the fireplace and made some snacks in the room. It was perfect!

The next day we headed out to some wineries in the area. I love a good winery and I was spoiled living in Oregon with the rich countryside and all the amazing wineries out there. We checked out one called Rocky Waters Winery and the Galena Cellars. When we got to Galena Cellars-they had a tasting tour going on and the only place to sit was outside. Since it was completely freezing this was out of the question. No problem! Mr. New and I made our own little seating area in the back of my little SUV. We didn’t have to deal with the wind and we had our own little picnic in the car. Wine, cheese and mini sandwiches in the back of my car. It was actually one of the highlights of the trip. Sometimes you don’t need perfection to make lasting memories happen

That night we went out again and enjoyed Main Street followed by another night in with a fire. We also caught a part of the Duck Football game! Go Ducks!

Overall everything was wonderful and I was so sad for our weekend to end. I do know that we will have many more in the future. We are already making plans to go to Galena again in the summer.

*** Thanks to the sweet viewer who I saw at the OP last night. She left me a napkin that said she loved reading this blog and hoped Mr. New and I had a wonderful trip to Galena. That was very sweet of you!

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I am so excited to go to Galena this weekend with Mr. New. We are leaving Friday and spending two glorious days there. Mr. New got a gorgeous room with a hot tub and a fireplace so we will be spending a lot of time relaxing while enjoying the sights and sounds.

There is a gorgeous winery there that I cannot wait to check out along with a blues and jazz club somewhere on Main Street. I cannot wait to look in all the cute shops and just spend some time away with my favorite person.

As soon as I come back it will be time to prepare for another trip. Going to VEGAS with my cousins! I have two cousins who I am very close to and we made a hasty plan that it was time to meet up for a girls weekend. I haven’t seen them in years and my sister will be coming as well. I cannot wait to sit out in the sunshine and spend time just laughing and joking with them.  One of my cousins Mariam studies at Harvard. She is getting her PhD and is planning to help children in Pakistan. She is very compassionate about her cause and I think will make a huge difference as an educated smart woman in our country.

The other cousin Reem lives in California with her husband and young son. She’s actually the youngest of us four cousins but the only one who is married. Next in line is my sister who will get married next year and then Mariam and I are up in the air

The four of us have so many memories from Pakistan and the times they came and visited us in Minnesota when we were little girls. I cannot wait to make new memories and see them again.

My cousin Reem on her wedding!

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On days that are disappointing Mr. New is right by my side fighting my battles along with me. I’m not sure I am used to it but I know that I love it.

Suddenly instead of texts that reference “me” it is now “us” and “we will”

Today was a good day but it had it’s bad moments. First off I found out I got a parking ticket at work! When I was driving to Fry Fest I got caught by one of those pesky red light cameras in Cedar Rapids. Though it was completely my fault for going too fast, I was still none too happy to get slapped with a 75 dollar fine! Quite a mood killer.

On top of it I raced home to apply for a grant for people starting hobbies and businesses in the Cedar Valley and found out right before cut-off that my idea was not one of the ones selected. I worked so hard on it and couldn’t believe it wasn’t one of the chosen winners. Bummer.

These could have completely ruined my day but Mr. New always finds a way to cheer me up. He completely sympathized with the ticket and then assured me that “we would figure out another grant for me” and that “we will find a way to make this happen”

It’s so nice to know I am not tackling the world’s problems all alone. I always feel like I have someone there to take things on with me and most of all just be there to listen. He’s pretty special this man of mine.

Not to mention we just hit the 6 month mark in our relationship. Six months ago that I happened to saunter into the Panther Lounge and have my entire life flipped upside the head.

Funny how life works. This was the note on my door this morning…

6 Months went so fast!

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In the Chughtai household we call a lot of things by nicknames. We usually add a (ey) to many words. Instead of breakfast we call it “Brek-ey” and we always understand when someone is “sicky” too.

That’s me right now and it’s not fun. When I was little I got sicky all the time. My asthma was so bad that I made frequent trips to the hospital for what I called “breathing treatments” and had to stay in the ER usually overnight. Now as I have gotten older I hardly get sick at all but sadly today I am.

I was fine at work and now here I am with chills, body aches and a weird metal(ey) taste in my mouth. Not fun to say the least. Being sick always makes me feel so vulnerable. My hope is this is just the 24 hour bug. I am so in denial about getting sick that I even got ready and drove to my RIPT class though the whole time my body was telling me not to go. I got to the parking lot and texted my friend Kelly to tell her I had to turn around. Now I am swamped under three comforters still telling myself I am just fine. Why do we deny when our body is clearly telling us something? When I was little and got sick my dad would always say “by tomorrow you will be running like a horse” and he was right 95% of the time.

I kinda wish I was home now with my mom doting on me and my dad doing frequent checks. It’s much better being sick as a kid than a grown up.  I guess I will have to settle for my dad’s text just now. “Don’t worry all will be fine”

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Another fun weekend is almost here and I cannot wait. This week has gone exceptionally slow and I kept thinking it was one day later than it actually was thus the weekend came at a snails pace. I am feeling good physically thanks to my RIPT class that is kicking my butt. It’s fun because you start to feel a little like a mini family all going for the same goal of losing weight and getting in shape. It’s only week two but I already see familiar faces and wave hello to a lot of the kind folks there.

Tomorrow night will be wonderful. Mr. New and I plan to relax with another homemade meal (he is cooking) and a movie. Just a relaxing night in front of the fireplace and lots of together time. I remember when a fun night for me included going out and dancing and mingling till the bars and clubs closed and now it doesn’t seem all that appealing. Don’t get me wrong–I still love it once in awhile and hanging out with the girls is a blast but it’s more fun to be home with someone who I don’t have to pretend at all in front of. It’s just real.

Saturday we are going to a car show that Mr. New is actually part of. This is a completely new experience for me. Mr. New has put a ton of dough into his Mustang and he loves that thing. I guess every year him and his dad go on a car cruise with a bunch of other cars which sounds fun but I have no idea what to expect. He took me for a ride in his car and I couldn’t believe I had to be strapped in with a harness across my chest and multiple belts. It was fun sitting in a car with that much power but I admit that it was loud and I had a headache at the end of the drive. It doesn’t matter though because I will give it a chance for him. Just as he supports me in my photography stuff–I want to be just as supportive in his ventures..though smelling like gas at the end of the day is a byproduct of it..:)

Saturday night we are going to a Roaring 20′s party ! I still need to find a costume and a flapper dress. I have no idea where to even go to get one but it will be fun to dress up and take some fun pictures with Mr. New!

I will be sure to post some pictures on here too. Have a great weekend Blog Readers. You are all extremely special to me!

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It seems everyday I get a text or several from my dad. If there is one person in the family that really keeps track of me–it’s him. I will admit that I am quite the Daddy’s Girl. Everyone in the family knows I am his favorite and we share a special bond. I can’t help but smile when I get that text from him that asks how his “million dollar news anchor” is doing. Yep–I love him.

He manages my 401K, has offered to be my agent, has told me to use him as my personal “secretary” or anything else I may need. He’s pretty special.

Lately he has been urging me to reach my goals more than ever before. I would never be as driven as I am today if not for my dad. He is constantly pushing me to do more, be better, learn more, go back to school. He is never content with complacency and so in turn–neither am I. If I don’t respond to a request from him he will remind me constantly until I do. He won’t take no for an answer especially from me.

I see some of his traits in Mr. New. He is extremely supportive of me and helps me achieve my goals. He also keeps me in check when my mind starts to wander too much or I get frustrated that I am not reaching my goals fast enough. The true beauty of a relationship is when you can bring out the best in each other. I hope that I am showing Mr. New that he can reach his goals and am pushing him professionally to be the best he can. I know that if I didn’t have my dad pushing me–it’s easy to get comfortable in life.

I see a lot of people who are stuck in situations where they are not happy. I hear a lot of people complain! It seems the people who complain the most about where they are personally or professionally are the ones who do the least to change it!

I will admit that it’s one of my pet peeves. I try to be supportive and understand but I get so frustrated with people who are miserable and do nothing to fix it! We all have choices. If you hate your job–then take steps to find another one. If you are unsatisfied with a relationship then fix it or leave. It sounds like I am simplifying it but in reality it really can be simple.

Life is a series of choices that we make.

On another note I am also finding that Mr. New is FAR better at certain household things than I am. I feel lucky to have a guy who does my dishes without being asked, takes out my garbage and picks up around the house. The other day I noticed a funky smell coming from the garbage disposal and Voila Mr. New grabbed a deodorizing packet he had bought from under the sink. I hardly know when he buys something for my place–I just happen to find it. I can cook things but I will admit that when it comes to having all the right kitchen accessories and household tools–well he is just better. I guess it was all those years of living alone and working long hours as a television anchor. It was much easier to heat up a frozen meal or grab a bag of chips than cook and store food in tupperware or freeze leftovers.

He even remembers to water my Orchid plant and wash my bedding. It’s refreshing. Oh and of course he leaves me notes every morning that start my day off right..especially when I am feeling overwhelmed and anxious about my photography business!

Just another thing I love!

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