Infertility: I’m Not Ashamed

April 22, 2014 2 Comments

I’m not ashamed to admit we can’t have biological children.

I’m not embarassed.


Used to be.

But in a way, I feel blessed.

Blessed that the painful road of infertility led my husband and me to the cutest girl on the planet.

Blessed because the moment we anxiously walked into a Texas hospital on August 4th and held our 2-day old daughter in our arms for the first time, we knew she was meant to be ours all along.

Blessed because infertility has shaped the person I am today — what I say, how I act, and what I do.

Last night I was honored to speak at the annual Cedar Valley Infertility Peer-Led Support Group.

There were some great resources available for couples — many of them are in the midst of treading the most difficult waters of their marriage.

At the event, I emphasized three things I wished others would have told me [but because we kept our struggles so private, no one knew what to say]:

1.) You are not alone.

2.) It is not your fault.

3.) You do not deserve “this.”

While I’m an adoption advocate, I recognize it’s not the right option for everyone.

So this week, during National Infertility Awareness Week, I’m focusing on this painful road so many people are facing.

And I encourage you to do the same…

Because according to, there are nearly 63,000 women in IOWA who have experienced difficulty getting pregnant.

And I can assure you — there is SOMEONE in your family, your neighborhood, your office, your church, your school, your circle of friends – struggling silently.

Stay tuned…


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  1. Sara says:

    Wish I could have made it last night. Thank you again for sharing your story and beautiful baby girl with us.

  2. Js says:

    Nothing is worse than when your doing all you can possibly do to get pregnant and then someone says: So, when are you going to have a baby?
    Seriously you’d like to rip their head off, but nicely you smile and say: Hopefully soon. Then run and cry.
    Thank you for your story!
    And you do have a very pretty little girl!

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