Mommy guilt…

July 20, 2015 1 Comment

The day we brought Nico home from the hospital, I was sitting on the couch nursing him.  Minutes later, then 3-year-old Giana walked into the family room…pulled down her shorts…and went “potty” on the floor. Number 2. On the family room floor.

“Giana, did you just poop on my floor?”


With that, the sassy curly-hair toddler whipped around and left the room.

In the weeks that followed, we found murals on the hallway walls that Giana drew with magic markers…she suddenly stopped remembering how to use the big girl potty…and her temper tantrums were off the chain.  It was quite obvious, she was looking for attention…she wanted to make sure I could still “see her.”

I’ve been having a tough time lately…a little bit of Mommy guilt.  For the past four years, it’s been the four of us. We have a nice routine down.  I have mommy and daughter days…and I have mommy and son dates.  I was watching them play with each other the other day and I thought, “everything is about to change…I need to make sure I don’t disrupt their routine.”

Then I thought back to four years ago when Nico was an infant.  Giana was at Montessori school and I took Nico with me to get a pedicure.  A woman, in her 80s, was sitting next to me and we started talking about life with kids.  I told her the story about Giana and “Poopgate.”  The woman leaned into me and said, “That baby doesn’t need anything but to be fed and have his diapers changed.  Your daughter is who needs ALL of your attention.”

She was spot on.

I had always been OVERLY affectionate with Giana.  But I gave that affection a shot of Red Bull and turned it into overdrive.

And. It. Worked.

So this time around, well, I’m not wasting any time.  (Because I could see my son pulling a Poopgate of his own).

I talk to Nico about how cool it is that he’s finally going to be a big brother…and it gets to be the ONLY boy in the house.  His response was classic Nico: “So I get to be the boss?”  Sure buddy. You’re the boss.

I have had heart-to-heart conversations with Giana…letting her know how special it is to be the first-born…she made me a Mommy…and how she’s going to have 2 little people who look up to her so much.  Her response was simple: “Do I still get to go and get my nails done with you?”  Absolutely kiddo.

The heart doesn’t divide…it just triples in size.


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  1. NEMOM says:

    I’m smiling from ear to ear after reading this. So special!

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