A letter to my first….

August 3, 2015 2 Comments

Dear Giana,

I know you are worried that I will no longer say that “you are my most favorite girl in the whole-wide world.” I do have to admit, you are going to have to share that title with your baby sister.  But there is something that you are — that your little brother and sister will never be — you, my love, are my first-born. You were the one who made me a Mommy.

I never really knew that I could cry uncontrollable tears of joy until that first moment you were put into my arms. My days of 8 hours of sleep at night were over the first day we brought you home…I thought I would be bitter about that.  Turns out, those moments at 1:00am, 3:30am and 6:15am when you woke up crying…were my most favorite of the day.  Those were the moments it was just you and me…rocking quietly on the rocking chair.

You turned my queasy stomach into one of steel. After all, I’ve held my hands out for you to throw up when you couldn’t make it to the bathroom…you had a level 5 diaper explosion on my lap at church and you have puked your fair share of breast milk in my hair.

You made it possible and bearable to watch the SAME Disney movie…over and over and over again.

You make me feel like a kid again on Christmas morning when your eyes light up looking at what Santa leaves for you…or on Easter Sunday morning searching for the Easter Bunny’s treasures.

Whether it’s when you read your first book…wrote your name for the first time…used the potty for the first time (sorry, I know it’s embarrassing)…slept in your big girl bed…sang your first song…got caught performing a Disney song in your playroom…had your first big girl sleepover…I have marveled in all of your “firsts.” Because your “firsts,” were also my “firsts.” And I have marveled in each and every one.

You were the first to start school…first to lace up your soccer cleats…first to tie in your cheer bow…first to lose a tooth…first to tell your mommy that you love her.

You defined love in a way that I never knew existed. That love won’t be taken away from you…it only multiplies with your brother and sister.

So there may be times when I am a little tired on a Saturday morning because I was up all night with your baby sister.  But just know this…I’ll be telling her stories about her big sister…and how proud I am of YOU.  Because when God made you…He made you absolutely perfect…and I thank Him every day that I get to be your mommy. But your brother and sister are even luckier…because they get to have YOU as a BIG sister.

Love you more,



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  1. NE Iowa Mom says:

    What a beautiful letter! Congratulations to you and your family on the birth of Luciana Grace! Hope Mom and baby are doing well.

  2. NEMOM says:

    This brought tears to my eyes – beautiful!

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